Sunday, June 4, 2017

Living a Real and Authentic Life - Guilt Vs Shame (Inaugural Trans Pride March Speech)

My name is Cynthia

... and I am a Woman

... I am also Transgender!

International Women's Day #BeBoldForChange
In March for International Women's day, I shared a bold idea, Acceptance without Understanding

During that speech I said;
. . . If you look around you who do you see? Strangers? People Different from you?

Or Maybe you are truly enlightened and what you see are other human beings?

I believe that Acceptance without Understanding is being Bold.

Do you need to have an understanding of me as a human being and the life journey I am on in order to define if I qualify for human rights?

Is that any different when we see human beings with a skin of a different color? Or from another country, different religion, different gender, different sexual orientation, or of Indigenous origin?

The reality is that if you consider yourself a human being you are already accepting, while I suspect most of you don't understand, and that’s OK,  you are not alone.

When I talk about acceptance, I am not asking you to accept whatever you perceive as my lifestyle. I am simply asking you to accept me as a human being.

Accept that as a human being my life journey takes me on a path, just as yours takes you on your life path. I ask that you accept that I am following my path.

We could continue to deny who we are in the many ways it manifests itself, but the unprecedented high double-digit suicide rate in all age categories is but one result of not following this life journey we are given.

For some people, they will never understand and that's OK because some days I am not sure I do. That’s why we use mental health professional’s who do not pass judgment on us but help us travel this journey so we can accept ourselves without the prejudice of understanding.

The reality is that you may never understand other human beings.

And that's OK because I am not asking why me, I am moving forward with the life journey I am on because moving forward is the only way we can go.

So Today as we prepare to March in the inaugural Transgender March, Brothers, Sisters & siblings how ever you identify I ask you to accept ourselves Vs understanding ourselves.

The battle we rage inside ourselves as we journey through transition is plagued with guilt and shame.

Guilt can be healthy, as it can be overcome as we learn to talk to and about ourselves, it helps us lift ourselves out of any negative perception we may have of ourselves.

Shame, on the other hand, it is destructive. It is a completely internal devaluation of yourself and as we talk to ourselves through self-reflection, what we see as shame does not uplift us.

How we talk to ourselves becomes an external reflection upon those we encounter, so when we challenge those people in our life to accept us without understanding, they look to see if we accept ourselves.

I want you to know that I believe, You are Enough!

In the words of Marissa Peer, Say it with me "I am Enough" (repeat as necessary)

Thank you

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